Vision of Love

I've been long overdue for getting my nails done. My 8th graders are laughing at my pedicure and calling me "crunchy toes."  Everyone who ever survived their adolescence knows how critical and insistent those little 12 and 13 year olds are. I am blessed to relive my middle school years over and over again throughout the months of September thru June (sarcasm). My kids judge me as much as they judge each other, so to say the least I am at the nail salon getting my nails done so I no longer have to deal with the disdain of my students. 

I pick Jason up from the bus stop and reluctantly ask him if we could go to the nail salon so

I can get my nails done. I'm not really asking him for permission, I'm asking so he can agree to behave in the nail salon. He is a homebody and would much rather go home, but with a little convincing, he says we can go if he can pick the color of nail polish for my toes. He starts signing: yellow, orange, green, blue, and gold. Once we got there, he picked purple. 

We have my pedicure color and I'm sitting Jason on the couch with his IPad. A little girl comes over to him at the couch. She is about 3 or 4 years old. She asked me if he was getting his nails done. I laughed and said no he wasn't. As cute and sweet as this little girl was, I got that zap in my brain and tightening of my heart. Would she want to play with Jason? Will she curiously point out that he doesn't speak? Will she unintentionally make him feel different from her? I think about going over and telling her that Jason is really cool and talks with his hands, but something tells me to wait and just watch. They both begin to watch his IPad, talk about Jake (in Jake and the Neverland Pirates), and play hide and seek. I watch and my heart is softened. I am reminded and witness that little children only see goodness and love. She never asked him about his silent voice or why his fingers spoke for him. She only saw him for who he is and not his limitations. I don't know why or when we lose the vision of love, but I would like to get it back. It's my thoughts and my fears that separate my boy from everyone. My eyes need to change. My heart needs to trust, and my voice needs to be silenced. Just like the eyes of the pretty little girl, I want to see love.